Friends & Family

Overview

One of the most important things for your family and friends to realize is that it is crucial to your well being to not be treated any differently than before the diagnosis. I heard a story one time about a woman who had just been diagnosed and who started to receive lots of calls from well-wishers. One day she was sick and could not make it to work, and the phone calls started again. "Is it your heart?" someone asked. "Do you need me to take you to the hospital?" someone else asked. She had to politely explain that she was just sick, not dying. This type of treatment can really get annoying -- even though it's obviously done with the utmost of best intentions.

Education

If some of your friends or relatives would like to learn more about MVPS, why not encourage them to join you when you attend seminars or support group meetings? Support groups usually welcome family members and friends with open arms. You can also suggest reading material for them if they are interested. I would never suggest to a friend or family member (or a doctor, for that matter) that they need to read certain books or articles. You'd most likely alienate them and make them uninterested. It's better to wait and see if they ask for information so they don't feel it's being pushed on them.

Another way to get the message to your family and friends is to sit down with them and discuss the situation. You can tell them exactly how you would like them to act around you. You can explain that your condition is not life-threatening, but that sometimes it can make you not feel very well and it may be at those times that you won't be in the greatest mood or frame of mind -- and for them to not take it personally.

Health

You should ask your friends to help you stay "good." Make them aware of your new healthy habits and positive outlook on life, and ask for their support. Of course we wouldn't want to be nagged (such as a nightly call, "Did you do your exercises today?" or "You didn't actually eat that, did you?"), but it is nice to have someone who cares enough to remind us what's best for us when we've seemed to forget.

Conclusion

MVPS affects everyone in a family -- not just the person who has been diagnosed with it. Learning to understand the changes that are happening to the person they love will help them to support and assist them when it's necessary. This kind of understanding is crucial to the well being of the whole family. It shows a lot of dedication, loyalty, caring and respect when members of a family (and friends, too) show an interest in learning more about MVPS. As long as you have people like this around you, you'll always be in good hands.